GenderLife Forum: The Information Exchange

I did too. The church I attend now seemed pretty good. Either I will change the opinions of enough people in my current church, or I will find a new church that suits me better, or I'll pray and read and commune with God without atttending a church, or more than one of the above.

While I agree that rattling cages may be a necessary step, I suggest caution. Don't try to do it if you're feeling vulnerable. I don't think the initial period of transition is the best one to go out there and fight such a big battle.

In order to "educate" people, the first thing you need to realize is that you can only "educate" them through who you are, not through what you say and not even through what you do. And that chances are you'll never obtain the effect you wish you had.

If you come across as unhappy, doubtful, scared, then no matter how nice is what you say, no matter how good your works, you won't get much out of it. You need to feel secure in yourself and happy enough to show your reality.

Education is not a process of bringing people around to your way of thinking, no. It's a process of making them understand that you have a different vision of the world, and your vision works as well as theirs, if not better. That can only be done if you're an all-around solid person.

If you're just starting transition, there will be days when you're weak and frustrated. There will be days with terrible news, and it will take you a long time to overcome them. You'll feel bad about yourself at points, you'll have doubts about what to do and what to say, you'll be scared about hurting people you love or care about.

Adding on top a need to educate your church may be too much.

Gracias Erica

Whoa. An established pastor? That's pretty heavy stuff. Then again maybe it was because he was having sex with a real woman and his uptight,frigid wife caught him and in order to stay in good standing within his community he had to leave the church. Who knows.

Amen sister!

Hope a church is many different things. It is most of all a gathering of people who have either a relationship with God or seek one. They may gather in a building or in a field. At an event to reach out to others or in a sanctuary to pray and meditate.

I see quite a few posters here who scoff at religious people and even more who slag off churches. Yet I also see many who long for fellowship and some sort of interrelationships with other human beings. Going to Ts happenings in my opinion can be wonderful but cannot provide a well rounded life by themselves. Being a member of society and focusing on the interests and the cares of a group of people provides a great deal of fulfillment when the interest is in being part of something positive in a community where you reside.

I love my fellow members of the congregation where I attend church. I try my best to serve the church and I look for nothing other than joining in worship with other members. In focusing on that I receive much more than if I actively sought some sort of personal benefit or reward.

To anyone who wants to slag off churches, God, the prophets, Jesus or anything associated with those I will simply say good luck and bless you for your concern. We all ultimately reap what we sow and neither I nor anyone else has the correct path for another. Go in peace and love.

Very often churches are the one institution helping the truly poor around. Also, some are close to support groups for people who are sick, or lonely, or just need to fill a vaccum in their lives.

You can belong to several churches at once without having any faith at all, just to be there trying to help with little things: installing their sound system, helping with tables at a potluck to collect funding for some good cause, helping with the drive collecting hair for children with cancer, etc.

Again, you don't need to be religious in order to help others. And in many places the only way to help (or think you try to help) is with the help of the churches (or groups, or congregations). I've never had not one tiny drop of religious faith, but I've been helping with churches and religious groups since I was in my 20s.

One thing, though: that you help and they tolerate you around doesn't mean acceptance. They may still barely talk to you, or treat you as someone who's there to be a servant. Well, if you're truly doing it to help (or to think you're trying to help) people, you won't mind that.

Hello,

I'm new here but wanted to give you a quick response;
I was raised in a strict evgangelical christian home.
The older I became the farther away from those narrow minded beliefs I became. Now at 42 I have my own version of what the world is and what the afterlife is.
I don't need the pessimism,negativity and judgemental ideals of such people and find them disgusting to even look at.
In the next life there will be a reckoning on those who cast dispersions and stones at the people that don't fit their inferior view of this world.
You did the right thing by sending the letter, now rest knowing you are in the right.


Julia

can this be moved to the religion section please ? as i dont wanna read about the church as its irrelevant to me and gets me into trouble when i discuss it

if it goes there i can avoid it