GenderLife Forum: The Information Exchange

So three frogs live in a bathroom. One in the tub, the sink, and the toilet. After a long night of sleep the tub frog asks the sink frog how he slept.
"not too good, about half way through the night it started to rain and it woke me up."

"You think you had a bad night!" the toilet frog exclaims, "Not only did it rain last night but a freaking log fell on my head!"

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I've known this joke since I was a child, just can't forget it for some reason.

Also feel free to replace the word "freaking" with "frakking"

You are so ugly the only dates you get are on a calendar

an attractive young woman walks up to a bar in a rural pub she signals for the barman to bring his face close to hers
" are you the bar manager " she asks running her fingers thru his hair

NO he replies
"can you give him a message ?" she asks stroking his face and allowing 2 fingers to slip into his mouth so he can suck them gently

tell him thers no Fucking toilet paper

NEWSFLASH

Victoria Beckham has confessed to having an affair with Pop paedophile Gary Glitter

Glitter has strongly denied this as he says he was in Brooklyn at the time

A 3-year-old boy examined his testicles while taking a bath.




'Mum', he asked, 'Are these my brains?'




'Not yet,' she replied.

An elderly patient was complaining to his doctor that the medication he was prescribed just wasn't working.

After disussing the problem, the physician said, "Sir, it's pronounced ann - el - gee - zick, not anal-sesic. Swallow the pills and they'll work a lot better."

In a hospital serving victims of land mines, a little girl wakes up from surgery.

Little Girl: Doctor, something is wrong... I can't feel my legs!

Doctor: Yes, we've had to amputate both your arms.

Bad Joke? Good one Natalie !

A guy walks into a bar with his pet monkey. He orders a drink and while he's drinking it the monkey jumps all around all over the place. The monkey grabs some olives off the bar and eats them, then grabs some sliced limes and eats them, then jumps up on the pool table, grabs the cue ball, sticks it in his mouth and swallows it whole.

The bartender screams at the guy, "Did you see what your monkey just did?"

The guy says, "No, what?"

"He just ate the cue ball off my pool table, whole!" says the bartender.

"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replied the patron. "He eats everything in sight, the little b*stard. I'll pay for the cue ball and stuff." He finishes his drink, pays his bill, and leaves.

Two weeks later he's in the bar again, and he has his monkey with him. He orders a drink and the monkey starts running around the bar again. While the man is drinking his drink, the monkey finds a maraschino cherry on the bar. He grabs it, sticks it up his butt, pulls it out, and eats it.

The bartender is disgusted. "Did you see what your monkey did now?" he asks.

"Now what?" responds the patron.

"Well, he stuck a maraschino cherry up his butt, then pulled it out and ate it!" says the barkeep.

"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replied the patron. "He still eats everything in sight, but ever since he ate that d*mn cue ball he measures everything first!"

What has 50 legs and 5 teeth?
The front row at a Willie Nelson concert.